Thursday, June 7, 2007

Big Bumpers win fights

I think my car is an accident lemon. (I'd say cursed but well I just don't believe in all that mumbo jumbo.) I have had my little Cavalier for the past 4.5 years and in that time she has been in 2 major accidents, 1 fender bender, 1 fight with a loading dock ramp at a restaurant and most recently butted heads with Corey's Big Beast of a truck. This doesn't include the gas pump exploded tire event of 2004.

How did this all happen? you ask. Well let me tell you!

Accident #1 - Can I blame the city of Vernon?
It was 4 years ago and it was my first winter in the Okanagan. It was the winter after the fires and we were getting a good dump of the white stuff. Feeling like the ever confident Noice driver. (That's right folks I still had my N) I was making the trip from Vernon to Kelowna one snowy morning. Now in my stupidity I had made the drive in these poor conditions multiple times and figured hey, I'm tough I can make it. I had just stopped to get a hot chocolate to go and was making my way up the hill out of town. Now it was early because I had to be at work by 8 and the city hadn't yet been out to plow the 2" of slush off the road from the night before. I was just rounding the corner by the info center and the college when I felt the front tires start to slip.

Here is where the first of my less the intelligent driving moves comes in....I Let Go of the Wheel! Why? because somewhere in the back of my mind I remember being told that in most accidents driver's react too quickly and cause themselves more harm than good. So rather than jerking my steering wheel and sending myself careening in the wrong direction I thought I'd take a breather. You know, count to ten, check my teeth, do my nails and then take control. You'd think that I'd taken all that time because in the 10 seconds that I wasn't holding the wheel the car set into a spin that I didn't know how to get out of. I was in the fast lane, going only 70 km/h trying to pass a semi truck when all of this happened and now I was quickly spinning directly into his path. By the grace of God and the Arnold sized muscles on my Guardian angel the truck didn't hit me. He should have but he didn't (This was a true testiment to God's faithfulness!) and when my tires hit the gravel they caught and rolled my car over. When all the action was said and done I wound up, upside down facing back the direction I came in the ditch. And aside from a sore tummy from my seat belt I was ok. Well, sort of. You see somewhere in my head I thought that nobody had seen the accident and I was going to be stuck there forever - and I found it comical. Yup, that's right. I laughed, hard! A few minutes later some kind motorists came, rescued me and the rest including ICBC's hard hit on my insurance is history.

Accident # 2 - This one really wasn't my fault!
It's one year later and I'm driving on an icy, sunny, Sunday afternoon back to Vernon to go to the gym for a work out. I now have good winter tires on my car and the knowledge that I'm not the best of winter drivers. But all was clear. The ironic part of this story is that I am coming up on the same corner as my previous accident, going in the opposite direction, when I see a small, old beater spun out in the fast lane. Now this is a highway folks and you can't just stop especially when there is a big, fast truck gaining on your bumper. So seeing that he's stopped and looking down at his dash I assume that he's going to say put and I proceed, with caution past him. Just as my car is moving past his front bumper in all his wisdom the beater driver decideds to put petal to metal and slams into the side of my car. I have no idea where the big truck that was behind me went, all I know is that I had just had my second accident and I was mad. We both pull over, get out to asses the damage and exchange information. I am shaking mad when I walk up to the other driver but doing my best to control my temper. He greets me with a smile and a "Sh*tty day eh?" "AAARGH!" was about all I could think of....he later ran from ICBC and it was a good month before my car was once again restored to her rightful condition. But this one was ruled in my favor and my insurance was safe. Hooray!

Accident# 3 - It was Me!
Not much to tell, was having a good cry over something stupid. Didn't see the doc, backed directly into it and gave myself something to cry about. Haha Thank goodness there was no damage on that one.

Accident #4 - I was talking, ok?!
This Sunday, we decided that we were going to City Park for a walk. Corey, Bethany and I piled into the car and headed off. Normally when Corey's home he drives and as you can see it's probably a good idear. But Sunday I decide that I was gonna steal the keys and drive. Now I'm in a giddy mood, happy and ready for a walk so I'm not really paying attention. Add to that, I'm a chatter box and was exercising my gum flapping muscles and you've got a recipe for disaster. I completely forgot that Cor was parked behind me, didn't check my mirrors because I back out a million times a day (be warned...slight exageration there), threw 'er in reverse and floored it. My car was met with a "BAM", "BANG" and a big shudder. And for one of the few times in my life I was speachless. It only lasted a few seconds but still... We took a look at the damage and after havin' her appraised it's going to be a very costly mistake. Grrrrr

After regailing ya'll with my tales I've come to a conclusion. It's not the car that's a lemon it's the driver. I think the best decision would be to send my driver's license back to the General Mills company so they can put into another cereal box for some new unsuspecting sole.


Anonymous said...

Poor Ash....I have a few tails to tell , but you are lucky enough to still have your car....MINE IS IN TRUCK HEAVEN!!! I think i had the same cereal as you did. I should send mine back too!
No worries your not alone....
Love Chels

Ma said...

Thank Goodness you have been aok every time!!! One important detail you forgot dear girl. Accident #1 I got a phone call IN CHILLIWACK that you were in the ditch upside down IN VERNON. I paniced and didn't know what to do and paced and cried and prayed. Accident #2 wasn't much different. I felt helpless! So glad you are ok. And I know things will be ok this time too. :) Love you

Anonymous said...

You always put such a smile on my face and in my heart, when I read your letters. You are probably a better driver than you think, so don't send your licence in yet. Just ask your loving husband about some of his stories, which I am sure he has already told you. I am sure most of us have similary stories to tell. Keep on writing, it so warms the heart, love you lots, Mom Kimmie.