Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Why I'm glad I'm not a man...

I was flitting around the great World Wide Web the other day and stumbled across an article written by a man, listing the top 10 reasons he's glad he's not a female. I had contemplated posting it here as it had some humour to it but the majority of the article was crude, ridiculous and nasty. However, it did get me thinking about all the reasons I'm glad I'm a woman and not a man.

This very concept is a great thing for me to ponder, as most of my teenage and early adult years were spend loathing the fact that God had made me a woman not a man. I mean really, they don't have to deal with a period once a month, or be accused of having PMS everytime they dare to show an emotion other than pure bliss. Trust me, it was rough to be me back then, or so I thought.

Anyways, in true list maker fashion here's my top 10 reasons I'm glad I'm not a man...

10. If I were a man I'd have to stand up to pee. This for me would be a problem, I can't even aim those little water guns at the target when we're at the fair.

9. If I were a man I'd be subjected to doing one thing at a time! I'd have to either watch TV or knit, listen to the kids talk or do dishes, think or drive....you get the drift.

8. If I were a man, I wouldn't have PMS to blame the outburst of random emotions on (hey, nobody said I didn't milk the issue when it suited me) or have an out pouring of emotion for that matter.

7. If I were a man I'd have to be dating or married to a woman and then I'd be on the receiving end of the above mentioned PMS and emotions

6. If I were a man, "screaming like a girl" at the sight of mice, insects or dead things wouldn't be acceptable. Not only that but I'd be expected to do something about them.

5. If I were a man, nobody would open the door for me on a date, pull out my chair or put their hand on the small of my back when I entered a room...I'd miss that.

4. If I were a man, I'd have to leave my legs hairy for fear of someone making a "girlie" joke about me.

3. And for that matter, If I were a man, I'd probably have hairy armpits, back, chest and butt. Ummm, sick.

2. If I were a man, I wouldn't be able to snuggle into Corey's arms and rest in his strength. It would be me that needed to be strong, and sometimes, I just need to be weak.

1. If I were a man, I wouldn't have the joy and privledge of being the Mommy to these two beautiful little girls...

Mother's Day Photos!


Niki said...

Loved this post, Ashley! You are a great writer!

Gorgeous pictures too! You look great! (And you sweet daughters are pretty cute too!)

Anonymous said...

I had to laugh at your list, it is great. I really love the photos, you are so beautiful, and your daughters really take after you. I thank God for blessing Corey with such a beautiful wife and friend, and daughters. Love you all Mom Kimmie

Anonymous said...

I am glad you aren't a man too!

Love ya
Mom / Grammy :)

Angella said...

This list was awesome. Hee!